Re-define the happiness. (Rant on happiness)

I was born and grew up in a surrounding where academic achievement, brands, looks and how much your parent earns monthly are big deals.

Those determine how many friends you made and it reflects how successful you are which also then determine your rank in popularity. Lols, childish much, ya ya ya I know! But hey come on, popularity does matter! Popular means you’re influential and influential means you can tease whoever you want and feels like to and be mean to some people you hate. Muahaha just kidding!

Well, I think what matters a lot back then when we were just a bunch of kids—is friends. Friends mean the world to us! Having a lot of friends is all you ever want. Alhamdulillah I thank Allah that I moved a lot from one school to another school hence in result, I have a looooot of friends, close friends and best friends that I can always count on! Alhamdulillah thumma Alhamdulillah.

Due to that (having a lot of friends) too, I faced various kinds of people. Some of my friend wouldn’t mind who am I and simply accept me for who I am. While some are concern about my academic achievement and endless-ly try to compete (by keep comparing my result with theirs like oh am gee). And there is few who concern about my family(like what my parent are doing, how much money do they make, your siblings’ academic achievement—omg I swear this kind of friend is the most annoying one) while some of them are those who concern about my stuffs. You know.. Like asking what is the brand of your this and that and why chose this fashion instead of that and where will you go for the upcoming school holiday omg leave me alone for heaven’s sake T___T

But then, I accept all my friends for who they are.. We were just immature at that time, oh well, what do you expect from a kid? Hahaha..

Eh all that is only the introduction part. Here comes the gist-- okay have you realized, we were all been defined by others all this while? What I was trying to say here is we let other people determine our happiness, goals and success. Perasan tak?

When the majority wants to be a doctor or engineer, we follow them. We want to be a doctor too. Just to be accepted by majority. The society says those who did not pursue their study are useless, hopeless and have no future. Thus, we all pursue our study simply because to have a degree as to not be labelled as useless and hopeless by society. That explains the existence of such typical dialog -- “kau ni buat malu mak bapak je” Sebab apa? Because we let others determine our happiness and success. See the connection now?

Jadi engineer/doctor tu pandai- who says so? Society. The majority.
SPM 9A tu berjaya- who says so? Society. The majority.
Jadi kaya tu untung sangat- who says so? Society. The majority.
Putih dan kurus tu cantik- who says so? Society. The majority.

Media plays a very important role in doing this. They broadcast only successful people (as defined by them) and keep promoting fairness (so that everyone believes that fair means beauty). 

Little did they know, psychologist found out that there is such thing as multiple intelligence which means every human has been blessed with different talents and everyone has something to offer. They have their very own potential. Not everyone has to be a doctor nor engineer. One who is fair is not necessarily beautiful-- vice versa. We are all beautiful in our own way, and beautiful can’t only be defined by physical beauty per se. We have inner beauty as well and it can’t be seen and judged by most people.

I used to be those people who were trapped in these crazy narrow minded things. I put so much effort to please people. They say TESL is cool, so I took TESL though I’m not into it (well, now I am!). They say thin is beautiful, and I am dying to have a slim body (well I am still not) until I stop pleasing people.  I stop using their indicator of success and happiness and use mine. I have my own definition of happiness and success. I do not have to follow others.

I am sooooo glad that I found Islam, the real Islam. My goal, success, happiness are all as according to the Quran which fit my heart best. I feel stressful no more because I have no one to please but Allah. And to please Allah, is much easier than to please people!

People says fair, slim and tall are beautiful but Allah says outer appearance means nothing. All that matter to Him is taqwa-- the beauty of the inside. Amazingly, that kind of beauty can only be judged by Him alone. How sweet!

People says you are successful if you managed to achieve your dream/ goals, able to travel the world, have a secured career with enough paycheck, get married to your dream man and have successful kids. While Allah says, the only success to Allah is being able to please Him. And for that is the biggest reward- Jannatul firdaus. 

People says the richest among you is the one who has plenty of money. While to Allah, the richest among you is the one whose good deeds saved them from the Hellfire. Whose deeds are all accepted by Allah..

Sadly, I just feel sooo weird when people nowadays are desperate to prove to others how successful and happy they are by uploading pictures on Instagram. Its like, “Hey look Im happy, I ate Mcd” then taking pictures with Mcd’s foods. (Boycott please anyway)

I know and I understand that you just want to share the happiness but you have to remember, you are trying to make ‘what should define happiness’ be mainstream. Ok like for example, when everyone is taking pictures of travelling, and like everyone is suddenly travelled and upload bunch of pictures. You tried so hard to show that travelling is happy and fun! I know it is! But what if there is some people who has few money and has family problem and has no chance to travel, you are making that person feels like they are unhappy.. Everyone has their own way of making themselves happy. Some people are happy as simple as just being with their family. While some need to spend time with friends in order to feel happy.. I don’t know, I might be wrong. Its just my humble opinion anyway.

I just do not like how social media has made others feel so little, felt lifeless and felt like we are nothing and have nothing to offer. For example, getting married early. They flood the timeline with pictures of solemnization and get thousands of likes and wishes and comments like-“bestnyewww, jelesnyeww etc etc”. You know, those are enough to say that majority define happiness as getting married early. Then how about people who still has no rezeki even if they are dying to get married early. You just make things worst :(

Let’s keep the happiness between us. Share only good things and inspire people by spreading positive vibes – without having to define how happiness should be like.

Well, let’s back to basic—back to the happiness as defined by Allah in the Quran. Success as defined in the Quran by Allah. As for me, I am beyond happy ever since I knew Allah. I am still getting to know Him more and I am sooo happy to learn more and more about Him.. It makes me fall even more in love with Him.... Honestly.

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